inside the offset

I began this
to see the
offset if possible
how far I could take it
overwhelming far-ending predicaments
predominantly predicting predilections
fueled on feeling flayed from
self by stress stratifying personable
attributes like lovingkindness to leadership
to loneliness and all becomes an anyways tipped off
at the end of the tongue to forget
something substantial is happening

it’s hard to see now through the haze of hard
leaning into hard weather this storm a purple heather
hue held off at a hand’s breadth wanting to consume,
and on in, and contain and compartmentalize into half
a human whole into loss of memory more so current than past
pulling pecks of hearts to swell at the trenches of sternum inflated
and crushed, to remember the wholeness once held holy and hungry before
to hold and have another half when one part past and other part
skipped a solid step past present so a sudden time comes to see
the self not present at present or present to self at all so gone completely
where the future supposedly sights the straight signals
to free a future being bothered before by past premeditating
and the journey just keeps climbing higher and
the path is so overabundant in rainfall and birdsong
that fills rivers with bouyant melody that brings beauty and distracts entirely
and I found it became possible to live this way long ago
but found it possibly the worst case of living

it has become living in nothing
like holding an empty mockingbird
that once promised spring